Angry post

Let me start off by saying that last christmas I came to Barcelona, I didn't bother making any concrete plans with friends/people prior to flying over, as I was confident that I could call them and meet up with them with little issue. I was miserable. Spent the majority of those two weeks suck at home, or wandering about the city aimlessly. I am thankful for the several, non-flaky ass friends that I was able to see and enjoy my time with. Props to you guys.
This year seems to have hardly changed. I can't stand materialistic people. In this day in age, as an eighteen-year-old, I'm pretty fed up with having to accomodate myself for others. It seems like I always make plans in advance and they either conflict with other pre-existing plans or don't happen at all.

I've called and messaged quite a few people, and none of them seem to feel the need to reply or give me a specific time or day to meet, really. I'll list a few. SO, about two weeks before my flight, I messaged one of my closest childhood friends(whom I've known since I was about eight or so) to let her know I was going to be around for the holidays and, like every year, was hoping to see her. I post on her wall that I was here, and when we could meet up. No reply for a couple of days. I check her wall and see that she has been actively replying to other posts on her wall. Cool. Just this very day, (and its oddly coincidential that it occured on the same day) I am walking down Las Ramblas, the center of Barcelona, and see her walking with a group of friends. She recognizes me and I turn my head wistfully away, feeling justified. Seconds later, I find myself even more frustrated that she didn't bother calling out to me or seeing what was up.
Scenario #2. Going out to the clubs alone is something that I leaves me feeling empty and unaccomplished. I had a "thing" with someone two years ago, which proved to be fun, fulfilling, and introduced me to the kind of night life that exists out there. Ever since, I feel as if I've been trying to recreate(if not half-heartedly waiting to run into the guy, whom I met at this particular club)that, with someone else, save for the emotional attachment.(I was not who I was two years ago, thankfully, so this is customarily managable) There's a certain uncomfortability about sitting alone at the bar while everyone else is talking and having a good time and watching the shirtless twinky boys poledance. Dismally, the many guys that have approached me have yet to struck a shord. Once I make it evident that they're not my type, they don't seem to want to have anything to do with me. Not even socialize. If I could just be casually careened into their group of friends, the possibility of me finding someone I'm attracted to would broaden.
Dating as a chubby chaser implicates navigating your way through the internet world. Men online: A picture of your face will always say MUCH MORE than a picture of your dick. Especially when its within the confines of a square, pixellated box. There is NOTHING flattering about it. I don't care for it nor have I ever been turned on by such, frankly. I'm a bit disappointed with San Francisco in this regard. I went out to the street fair in hopes of meeting someone and all that went down was getting groped by a stranger and this impish-looking grunge/scene kid asking me on a date.

This is all I have to say for tonight. I sent out a couple of more messages out and am dejectedly waiting for responses.